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#i can’t breathe

“Sometimes when you’re in a dark place you think you’ve been buried but actually you’ve been planted.”
― Christine Caine

In torrent waves whose current force me further and further into the deep waters. I flail my arms in a desperate attempt to surface the watery mirages that seek to drown me.

Starting out as droplets they seemed harmless at first, but like a dripping tap they congregate and grow into a puddle…a pool…a pond of water…a lake…an ocean….

The Mirages I speak of are those who I celebrate as they move swiftly in their sphere of influence. I watch as they network and form impressive waves of illusion like niagara falls, when inspected closely are nothing but mere droplets of tap water. But as I observe and admire their progression, I am caught off guard like a starry-eyed fan, standing face to face with her idol. Disappointed and despondent, I am left stranded with nowhere to go. Wasted time I can never get back, my soul submerges in deep depression. Anger begins to fill my empty space, I’m choking, airwaves closing in on me. #icantbreathe

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With arms surrendered, I relinquish my will to fight.  I can either let it overwhelm me or I take charge and allow it to move me towards my onshore.

Do I sink deeper and deeper into a watery grave or allow my anchor to keep me afloat the overwhelming crashes of wind hitting hard against my back. 

Yes, I choose to relax, and rest in Him.

You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand  (Oceans, Hillsong)

Resuscitated back to life, my breathing slowly regulates, air begins to fill my lungs. My living rescue boat has arrived. The captain of my ship forming my arms to stay afloat. He  makes my legs become the engine that would allow me to move, and my eyes firmly fixed on Him above the water. I find my self steering back in the direction I wish to go.

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I can breathe, finally  I can swim, yes I’m  afloat. Instead of being distracted by the watery mirages, I choose to let them be the substance by which I lay and keep my head above water.

Thanks for reading, and as always your comments are warmly appreciated.

Signed,

Anchored

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