#Life Goals

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Skiing trip (Living vicariously through the lens of my son) #lifegoals

#lifegoals is trending. Life is happening right this minute whether we choose to actively participate or not. 

Well, I certainly hope that you are having a great day today.

It is an honour to be back to continue on our journey. It’s only the second-month of 2018 and I know many of you have made resolutions I prefer to call (goals) that really are going to make a difference in our lives. 

To be resolved for me means simply choosing and sticking to a cause of action by goal setting for your life that you plan to stick by.

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Surprisingly Satisfied 

Welcome to my ”Season of being surprisingly satisfied”. This year I’ve chosen to be a refreshing fountain of living water. I’ve decided to walk this purpose out being intentionally content regardless and irrespective of my current circumstance. And let me tell you, 2018 came for your girl. It’s a war outchea but I’m still standing. 💁🏾‍♀️ I’ve realised that in order for me to successfully stay on course and remain content I must first embrace my authentic self. If you read my blogs you know I write often on my need for choosing to live life authentically.

This entry is basically an encouragement to you (and me) don’t get it twisted every time I share something there’s a message in it for me also. Somehow God always decides to change the direction of my entries as it materialise. If you have started 2018 with the greatest of intentions only to plateau at the first hurdle. Trust me I have been there many times in the past and it can only get better from here. 

Let me encourage you today to give yourself a break, a hug and to tell yourself ”self we will go again” quitting is not an option, a decision I made a long time ago when life was challenging me at every corner. 

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.  

Martin Luther King, Jr

Find the thing that brings you joy. Only you can figure that out so get to discover. For me, it’s alone time. I take retreats often and cherish my coffee mornings in the early hours when mostly everyone is still asleep to just think and hear myself speak out loud. I also find journaling daily is great for me to process my thoughts. It’s crazy how many people choose to share blogs with the world but never take inventory of their own private thoughts by simply cultivating the discipline to journal daily. (Not throwing shade, opinion not fact). Journaling for me is one of the greatest tools I have adopted since teenage years. Not only does it help me to reflect, refuel and rebalance my mind and emotions amazingly it leaves me fully recharged and empowered. After several of these journaling sessions with God, I have found that this place is my most authentic and truest in finding and hearing my voice. I call it my place of unshakeable peace and I encourage you to cultivate the same for yourself this year. 

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My then 9-year-old son building his life with vision. (He will be 16 this year) I can’t tell you how incredibly proud I am of the man he is becoming as he chooses to live his best life. 

Being a healthier version of myself is one of my main goals this year. And I believe if I’m a healthy mom, a healthy daughter, sister and friend I’m being authentic to those around me and therefore a more valuable gift to all and myself. Let’s be honest you are better sound and whole than you are fragmented and chaotic. You will find that those goals (resolutions) become easier to tackle and stick to over a cause of time once you’ve allowed and given yourself permission to clear the clutter and set out your life goals.  

I understand that every season is different and right now you may be reading this thinking what if I can’t meet my goals this year? Friend, rest in God’s sovereignty. The amazing work He started in you, He will finish. Life might not be happening the way you expected in 2018. Circumstances might not be what you envisioned when you pictured your life years ago, but trust Him in the process. This year alone I’m being challenged to trust God more than ever before for what His best is compared to my mediocre that if I had my way would run ahead with. Literally 6 days into this new year I had to witness the man I love get dealt some losing cards and for sure I could’ve sworn the hand that dealt them forgot to include in the deck the winning suits. All I could see was a pack of jokers with every shuffle. As we go through a terrifying and frustrating time I am reminded of my inability of not being able to ‘fix it’and my dependency on my God who He is ultimately the only one that can ‘fix everything’. Isn’t it like God to have me in a season where I find myself surprisingly satisfied and yet facing some of the most challenging things I’ve ever had to face in my life thus far. I guess truth be told my position is not based on the circumstances that surround me rather my surrender in Him.

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Couldn’t pass on a perfect opportunity to take a picture with our favourite ride. Clearly, car is not ours we stay daydreaming #lifegoals

So often we think the impossible before we even contemplate our own possibilities or the power that lies within. For me, it is the ultimate surrender of relinquishing all of my wants and desires in exchange for His ultimate best.  We don’t have to live this life alone and that is always a great encouragement.  He is working, even when you don’t see Him or feel Him. He will complete what He began in you. He will equip you for the task and see you through. Your job is to abide in Him and leave the results in His hands.

Don’t disappear when the “work” of your life isn’t turning out as you had expected. God’s not done with you yet!

Love  Jewel xx

Please feel free to share and comment, your feedbacks are warmly welcomed. I’m still finding my way. 

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Chosen

img_0544Hey Moms,

Age 21 and chosen,

‘Yikes, tomorrow my son turns 15’. To God be the glory…

This life can have you twisted, and learning to unknot is a skill worth pursuing. In this post I share with you the unknotting secrets as a young mom, attempting to raise a modern day knight, in today’s generation. Even in the midst of battles.

It’s not how you start, heck even the knockouts don’t count. Have you ever watched a boxing match? Sometimes I’ve been convinced that the guy who got punched the most, was indeed the one who’d lose the fight. Numerous times we come to realise that it was never the blows he fell from that kept him from loosing. It was his resilience not to stay knocked down, and get back up. This has been my question to me for countless years. ‘Jewel, can you get back up! Stronger than before’?

I love being a Mom. Seriously, I can’t think of any other role better suited for me other than being a parent. I’m grateful that God chose us for each other. If honoured with the choice to make, biasly, in the world of one being born every minute, I’d chose my son, without pause or hesitation.

My exposure to parenting wasn’t the most ideal. Discovering I was pregnant was pure comedy to me. It was then I knew this God has a sense of humour. The scripture that God would choose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise suddenly made sense to me. Looking back now I see why he did that. I could never take credit for the baby I once cradled into a boy and the boy who is being shaped into a man today.

Clearly, I was to be tested as rain decided to poo over my fairytale story. Oops, we’ve hit a wall. Hands down, this was a bad crash, a wreck that I was so convinced at one stage would have no survivors. And if anyone was to survive we would’ve lost a lot of precious money can’t buy moments that time was evidently determined to rob from us.

Counting the grey hairs, and sipping into a cup of chai latte, I sobbed uncontrollably at the fear of losing my adorable son to this world and its ideologies. I watched our relationship become knotted right before my eyes and could do nothing to unknot it, at the time.

Truth, my childhood was crap. Perhaps you could relate, not be trying to paint a sob story but it was what it was, nothing more or less. Growing up I was taught a child was to not be seen, and certainly not be heard.

Put the light on, I can’t see in the dark!

The longer I get to live, the clearer I see things. I have come to realise that love is so much more than words. In the trenches it requires grit, the tenacity to never give up. The willingness to go again. True living is you waking up and making the decision to make every day count. I’ve learned to understand my losses, and deciphering that losing is sometimes winning, and not all wins are good.

As my son’s earthly parent, I believe that it is my job to make sure that I choose our battles wisely. I recall so many wasted days of our precious time on pointless arguments that now in hindsight were meaningless.  I have learned to be quick at saying sorry, and meaning it while teaching my son to never go to bed angry with me or himself.

In the chaos and confusion of this unpredictable journey called teenager life I have come to a conclusion that God is not wasteful and with him, nothing is ever wasted.

It is believed that breastfeeding helps mothers to bond with babies because it releases the ‘love’ hormone. Scientists have discovered the secret behind how breastfeeding helps mothers bond with their babies, that the release of a chemical in massive surges helps to enhance a mother’s feelings of trust, love and affection to the baby.

Whether this be true or not, I would like to hope that the three years of breastfeeding has contributed somewhat to our bond, that is (unbreakable).

According to the book of Proverbs, it talks about training up a child in the way he should grow. And when he is old he will not depart from it. I do believe this to be true. Life experiences have taught me that whatsoever we sow, we will eventually reap. I see this to be also true in the parent and child dynamic. As parents, we have the awesome privilege of being the primary teachers to our children’s’ early childhood development. If we get this right, we have the power to shape their young minds into something brilliant. My only regret is how late I came to discover this truth.

Parents, we are under-shepherds sent out on assignment by the ultimate father. He holds the blueprint of all our lives and somewhere in his marvellous plans for mankind, he saw you and me, raising up the future generation.
How often I lay awake, full of gratitude that he entrusted me with such an overwhelming gift. For this, I am eternally grateful. It’s not rocket science that this is something we cannot do alone. I don’t know about you but without the grace of God, there’s no way I could attempt this assignment called motherhood.

Hello, God you know this is a human life you’ve entrusted me with, right?

I am my son’s teacher and also his student. A good teacher must also be teachable.  ‘No dream is too huge was one of my favourite things to implement in our space, a place where whatever dreams, goals, ideas my son would play out for my ears to hear, my mouth would be in agreement with him.

Parenting from my broken places has brought its own demons along the way.  I’ve made mistakes and repeated actions that I never imagined in my life I would’ve made. But giving myself permission to be human and asking for forgiveness from God firstly, my son and in my opinion more importantly myself. It is true that we are harder on ourselves than others are on us. So teaching myself the importance of truly letting go, and counting losses as wins have been a major game changer for my parenting journey.

Routine for me has been the hardest thing to protect. If I’m honest consistently making sure we protect our date nights, and coffee mornings are perhaps the hardest. With work, school, church and activities in-between. You soon come to realise that time is disrespectful. You will find the older your kids get, the more on purpose you will have to be in maintaining consistency with your families schedule. Sometimes we have to tweak plans as seasons change, be ever ready! Some of our best dates have been the random last minute ones.

Becoming my child’s friend was never my plan but having him respect me and have reverence for me as his leader, under God, has and always and will be my main priority. Gaining a friend along the way, is just Gods unmerited favour, doing what he does best.

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We were chosen and have the pleasure to work alongside the architect. And as his vision becomes clearer to us, we can begin to see the picture unveiling with each stone that is laid. The foundation stages are the longest, and that’s why even after 15 years, I would say I am still at below ground work. It may seem like a never-ending stage but trust the process. It is at this level that if you endure, you will develop strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope that will never disappoint usbecause God has poured out his love to fill our hearts. I may be young, but I’ve come to the conclusion that God makes no mistakes. I was chosen for such a task, and so were you.

Parents, of all ages but especially to those raising teenagers, hang in there. The season may seem like it’s never going to change. But it does. No storm lasts forever. The joy of winter is that springtime is right behind it. Parenting a teenager is challenging because right before your eyes, the ‘baby’ you once knew, is no longer a baby but a grown adult.

Thanks for following my journey and reading. Please feel free to like, comment or share. Any questions you’d like to ask please feel free to do so. I look forward to walking with and unveiling more to you.

Signed,

A mother’s heart

I am Woman

img_1312 More precious than jewels

I’m  more than a face and more than a body.

I’m more than a vehicle used for pleasure.

And much more than a gentle kiss and a soft caress.

So much more than a cheap date and a night-cap.

I deserve more than sweet words and empty promises.

More than a longing and a wishing for something that isn’t forced and comes without resistance.

I am a woman built with stones of turquoise

My foundations with sapphires and my battlements made out of rubies.

My gates of sparkling jewels, and my walls of precious stones.

I am more; precious than rubies

Born for such a time as this

My worth far exceeds your temporary validation.

Even after the applause dies down

My worth will continue till the ends of the earth.

You see, I am woman 

Made for the completion of man

The perfecting of his needs

To bring him help.

Without me, he’s made without function

I bring value to the promise.

Entrusted by the maker to be so much more than eye candy.

I lost the worth in my value

Lost the price tag that used to be attached to me.

So many have come by to have a look, but without care left me back on the shelf to gather dust.

Some didn’t even take a second glance,

Others simply stared.

They don’t see the work that’s gone into the perfecting of my splendour

I am much more!!!

Desperate to scream out this truth

But choked with dust and inferiority I sat there allowing potential buyers to devalue my virtue.

Bartering rates to lessen my price.

Until one day I found my voice

I am worth more and refuse to settle for anything less… 

img_1536-1Lost & found

Jewel ❤️